Maybe We Should Keep On Dancing
My bittersweet concert travel tale of fandom and love
Before me stands someone clearly burdened by the guilt of breaking my heart.
Okay, perhaps that's a bit melodramatic. It's just a guy losing his voice from a cold, and many of us were eager to hear him sing. I'm not sure if anyone else traveled over 1000 miles each way for it, but that's on me. The important thing, of course, is his health and well-being. I did meet people who came from far and wide, at least one like me, who came by herself. But you're never alone when you spend hours waiting patiently before doors open and snag that coveted barrier position at a concert. You instantly gain a family. So when I held back a couple of tears, my family was there for me. And we were all there for Justin Hayward-Young of The Vaccines when he had to cut short his set Saturday. We were sad, but he was clearly devastated. I’ve been to plenty of shows where the artists seemed to be on auto-pilot and didn’t really seem to care that there was even an audience there. This was different. He is a seasoned pro, not just at writing and performing, but at connecting with his audience. I’ve spoken with many artists over the years about their relationship with fans, especially their superfans. Y’all, in most cases, they love us just like we love them. Although I haven’t had more than a very brief conversation with him there is not a doubt in my mind he did not take this lightly.
While I might illustrate it with my story, in fact, this post is a tribute to fans and the artists who love them. I won't bore you with all the details, but suffice to say I'm a huge music fan. I've spent many years of my career in the music business, and this is my favorite band of all time. I've seen them many times at festivals, but have never seen them perform a headline-length set. That was my goal.
Yes, that setlist from 13 years ago is framed and hanging in my office. So maybe crying, even a little, about a shortened set is a bit extreme. It’s not like they canceled altogether and never gave an explanation. Still, I think most music fans can understand. Justin is my Taylor Swift. In fact, it was my daughter’s love for Taylor that inspired me even to book a flight and go. You see, I’m a practical and reasonable person. Flying from Texas to Ohio for one night by myself, especially less than a week before I spend a week seeing great live music with friends at SXSW is not something I would do. The only other time I have traveled to see an artist was for my childhood crush and hero, Rick Astley, who I never got to see as a kid because I moved to America just as he was taking off in the UK. He canceled the gig in New York that I anticipated would allow adult me to realize my childhood dreams - and never gave an explanation. I’m not bitter (ok maybe a bit). It’s only been twenty-something years. I did eventually get to see him years later. Ironically, I was sick with a cold, but nothing would stop me. God bless my dear friend Becky for coming with me. Becky gets it, and she just went to Las Vegas to see U2 by herself so she’s pretty awesome for that and many, many, more reasons.
Look what you started
Is this what you wanted?
You took me to the desert
And left me there haunted
Now I don't really know if I deserve redemption
But I don't need another reason making mе feel bad
Oh, no
- Lunar Eclipse (Pick Up Full Of Pink Carnations)
I almost didn’t go. Lucky, my daughter, and I have a pretty intense rivalry over whether she is a bigger Taylor fan or I am a bigger fan of The Vaccines. So when I said I couldn’t go because it would be insane to fly to a different state, solo, for one concert, that wasn’t even technically a headliner, she said she’d do it for Taylor. Furthermore, she added that if I didn’t go, I couldn’t claim superior fandom anymore. My fantastic husband, David, agreed - though neither of them agreed to come with me, they insisted I go. That’s true love right there. My good friend Kerrie, the ultimate queen of concert travel and VIP experiences, also piled on telling me about all the times she did it for her favorite bands. So I did. Hey Taylor - how about a collab with The Vaccines on that rock album everyone keeps asking for? Seriously though, I love Swifties. I love meeting y’all and watching you dance your heart out. I love hearing you clown. I love it when you give me, the momma who sticks out like a sore thumb, friendship bracelets at her shows and dance parties and the movie. Yeah - I’ve done them all. I know the love you have for Taylor and I believe in the love she has for you. The world needs more people who find connection, community, and pure joy in that way. To me, music is not about what you hear. It’s about what you feel.
Can we shut down a water park and have a Vaccines party? Asking for a friend.
The good news for many of us is that Swifties often aren’t old enough to sit at airport bars for hours on end and tell everyone they meet about her. Yeah, guilty as charged. I took a super early flight to accommodate any potential delays. I planned to get early check in at the airport hotel, but apparently due to some Arnold Schwarzenegger thing (?!) they were slammed and couldn’t get me in early so I had no where to go and nothing to do but sit at the airport bar. I actually love airport bars. You can usually hear some great stories from all types of interesting travelers killing time. People thought my story - my mission - to fly solo to see my favorite band was inspiring. Or at least they did a great job pretending. Travelers stuck in an airport bar are real. You’re never going to see these people again. There’s no history and no future. It’s very much living in the present in a genuine way that is rare under any other circumstance. My favorite group was four guys on their way to a Bachelor party in Las Vegas. It was their first time to Vegas so I gave them tips (as I relayed the story to David he pointed out that they obviously will use ALL of them because four young guys on a bachelor party will want to do exactly what I like to do in Vegas.) Well, they were at least staying in the same hotel Lucky and I are booked for this summer. And yeah, the groom said his fiance wants to go this summer, so of course I suggested FreedomFest - because it’s a fun challenge to have a conversation in which I mention both my favorite Justins - Young and Amash.
“And I don't wanna let it go.
You know I'm not a weirdo, no
I don't wanna let it go
You know I'm not a weirdo.”
- Weirdo (Come of Age)
OK, maybe I am a weirdo. But I own it.
Eventually got checked in and over to the venue two and a half hours before doors (as one does.) Here, I met Kim, my new Vaccines bestie. It’s kinda scary how much we have in common even outside of our superior taste in music. She drove solo from Cleveland. One thing I will say for sure - as an expert in fans, for real, I used to get paid for it - The Kooks certainly had more fans in attendance by far and many were awesomely engaged, but The Vaccines fans brought the most passion. And Daisy The Great was… well, great. I will be looking out for both bands again. Whoever put together this lineup was on fire. And don’t even get me started on the Matt Hitt fan I met. She didn’t know he was with the band on his tour so I got to experience her utter exuberance when he walked out with the band. Like I said, I love fans. Her joy and the hug she gave me when that happened was almost worth the trip in itself. Can they just announce him as a full member already? The exit of Freddie was tough to handle, but we’re ready to move on. I was more surprised by the lack of Árni. That kinda made me sad, but I finally was about to see my Vaccines headline-length set. Or so I thought. I have seen them live at SXSW quite a few times, but festival length sets aren’t good enough for your favorite band of all time, amirite? After all, I took Lucky to the Eras Tour…
A few songs in I turned to Kim and said, “Something is wrong.” They were still great and one probably had to be a super fan to sense that something was slightly off. Still, we danced and sang and had a grand old time. Justin tossed me a pick which is now among my most treasured possessions. Later, Kim jokingly pointed out that I now had whatever germs put him out of commission. Whatever - I’m Vaccinated 😜 So with all that said, I think my teary eyes can be forgiven when Justin announced he couldn't complete the set. It’s not like full-on waterworks. Just a couple of tears. I was still there and still so grateful for the experience. I have never been able to hide my emotions. At that moment I thought they were just going to end it right there which would have been understandable, though an even greater tragedy. Still, they soldiered on and pulled out a few more hits for us starting with Headphones Baby which I deem to be tied with Pink Water Pistols as the most romantic song ever written - replacing Sinatra’s 1957 rendition of All The Way by Van Heusen and Cahn, which was perhaps a more conventional choice. I should note that when my husband proposed to me my answer was, “Yes, you dumbass,” so my idea of romance might be a wee bit messed up.
I wanna live inside your headphones, baby
I wanna live inside a world wherever you are
-Headphones Baby (Back In Love City)
Speaking of my amazing husband and romance, when I arrived home Sunday morning, he greeted me at my car (and yes he had offered to do my airport runs, but I wasn't gonna ask him get up early the previous day just for me to see a show.) He grabbed my bag and gave me a huge hug. He told me, “Go find yourself another date to fly to.” I said I thought most of them were sold out and he even said, “That's ok, Get a resale ticket, whatever it costs. I want you to go.” Isn’t he the absolute best?! So I could insert a joke here about after 19 years of marriage, the most romantic thing he could do is tell me to leave the state without him again, but it's true. He knows me.
So long story, most definitely not made short - I’m going to Denver. I hear Árni might be there by then, and although I know there are no guarantees of a healthy Justin and a full set, I’m gonna keep on dancing.
So maybe we should keep on dancing
Maybe we should keep on dancing
I feel like something good is gonna happen
Don't care if I'm the last one standing
Even if the song's all gone and it's the end of the world
No, nothing's gonna stop us, gonna stop us now
- Discount De Kooning (Pick Up Full Of Pink Carnations)